Social Confidence

As an experiment a group of people who had never met each other where put in a room and given the instruction to mingle. This was the only instruction given apart from one exception. One person was told that they cannot say a single thing about themselves and just find out as much as possible about the people there.

At the end of the session each of the people filled in a questionnaire and were asked who they had met they found the most interesting company. You guessed – The person who came top was the one they knew nothing about but who asked them about themselves!

Give it a go – feel tongue tied in company – Don’t know what to say? Then get curious, ask them about themselves. If you want to develop excellent conversation skills than check out and learn ‘Active listening skills’- These are what therapist used to put their clients at ease and they work equally well in general company.

Some while back I lacked social confidence. You know the sort of thing – being self conscious and feeling tongue tied in the company of people I didn’t know well.

I had spent many years focusing on trying to resolve it. A point came when I realised something very important. And that was trying to be more confident wasn’t working and what I need was an antidote. Something completely different, radical that would engage me in a way whereby confidence or no confidence wasn’t actually in my thoughts. I found that antidote was curiosity.

Stop trying to be confident and get curious.

Stop trying to stop the problem and start the solution. Be curious about the person you’re talking too. It’s not about what you have to say about yourself, it’s what they have to say about themselves.

Being at ease in company whether it’s professionally or socially is such an advantage. If you want to become more confident at work and/or play then changing your mental attitudes and developing your interpersonal skills is the way to go.

I am confident a few intensive sessions with me will make all the difference. You will found out how to be in the best emotional state and become adept at skilful communication